hero default image
Effective leaders, especially congregational ones, know the difference between content and process and focus on process rather than content.
Beliefs, doctrines, mission statements, organizational plans, and program agendas are content.
Relationships, the hidden life dynamics, vision, leading from the self, and staying connected have to do with the process.
A focus on the process will examine how a congregation works, solves problems, gathers information, makes decisions, communicates among its members, and so on.
Learning how to distinguish content from the process is difficult, primarily during times when acute anxiety is at play.
For example, messages of seduction and criticism sound and feel different. Still, they are both designed to bring about the same effect: to get the leader to “move back” (to abandon a vision or not proceed with a plan of action).
Goleman cites a study of leadership among star performers that identified the unique strengths of that elite group. The study identified four competencies:
But here is the challenge to prevailing notions of leadership as expertise: no technical or cognitive competency was identified as a unique strength among these influential leaders.
This finding helps to highlight that effective leadership is not about expertise or technique—it is about the ability to influence emotional processes. The leader’s ability to influence the emotional process requires a good level of “with-it-ness.”
With-it-ness refers to the level of awareness a leader has about the emotional process at work in the hidden lives of congregations.
With-it-ness, however, begins with the leader’s self-awareness—being in touch with what one is feeling, reacting, or responding to (a distinction that is not always easy to make) and with what is happening inside one’s head.
Unless congregational leaders can observe and assess their feelings, biases, perceptual distortions, and impulses, they cannot tell whether their interventions are rooted in perceptions or reality or determine what would be the most helpful response in a situation.
Without with-it-ness, leaders cannot assess how the hidden life forces of the congregation are being played out, and, therefore, they will be unable to distinguish content from process.
With-it-ness includes what Goleman calls resonance, which is akin to empathy. Resonance means being attuned to how others feel in the moment. Only in this way can leaders influence the process by saying and doing what is appropriate for the emotional process—whether it be to calm anxiety or raise it, confront anger, or respond with humor.(1)
Being attuned to the emotional process of one’s context enables the leader to sense how the congregation’s shared cultural values and priorities influence the members.
A leader who lacks with-it-ness will not be able to influence the emotional process of their congregation because they will tend to be out of sync with what is going on in the group.
With-it-ness enables leaders to stay connected emotionally, which facilitates listening and taking other people’s perspectives—to see things from the vantage point of their place in the system.
This allows leaders to tune into emotional channels that create emotional resonance between people.
Only when there is emotional resonance between the congregational leader and the congregation can the members hear and respond to the challenges of vision.
Emotional resonance allows people to hear each other, regardless of the words used and whether the message is comfortable—like a prophetic challenge or when brutal honesty and speaking the truth in love are necessary.
Israel Galindo is Associate Dean for Lifelong Learning at Columbia Theological Seminary. He directs the Pastoral Excellence Programs of the Center for Lifelong Learning.
Adapted from The Hidden Lives of Congregations.
(1)Daniel Goleman, et al. Primal Leadership (Boston: Harvard Business School Press, 2002).
