The Five People You Need as a Leader

They say leadership is lonely, which is true to a real extent. Few understand the weight of responsibility that comes with leadership or the relationship shifts that can bring isolation and distance. However, to say leadership is a lonely position does not mean one can do it alone.

Even the most differentiated leaders need meaningful connections to others in work and personal support systems. If you ask most leaders for the secret of their success, they’ll likely tell you two things: “I surround myself with the best people” and “I have invested in a long-term peer support system.”

When one is in a leadership position, one’s network of relationships expands and narrows. You’ll be connected to a broader number and variety of people in the organization to some extent and in several capacities. At the same time, you’ll also narrow the scope of your direct charges, your “inner circle” of second-chair leaders, associates, and support staff.

In other words, you need to be present to all but accessible to only a few. In the mix of those networks, there are five people every leader needs to help them be more effective.

You may discover these five people within your organization as work colleagues. Others may exist outside of the job environment. Regardless, they each contribute something important to your success as a leader.

1. The Encourager. Whether friend, second chair, spouse, deacon, or Mom, this is the person in your life, sometimes the ONE person, who says, “You can do this.” And because they genuinely believe it, you’ll believe it too. This may also be the person who helps you give yourself permission to take a day off or allow yourself a “mental health day.” Sometimes, this is merely the person who, regardless of circumstance, just likes you, no matter what.

2. The Antagonist. While irksome, every leader needs an antagonist. Iron sharpens iron, and leaders may grow dull without the challenge antagonists provide. Antagonistic people may be reactive, but they are not necessarily unintelligent. Suppose you can listen to their arguments and perspectives past the grating annoyance. In that case, they can provide correctives to your blind spots. Believe it or not, antagonists can be a resource to a leader as long as they don’t tip over into sabotage

3. The Skeptic. Most leaders are, by necessity and character, optimists. They likely would not have taken the job if they didn’t believe in possibilities, potential, and ultimate positive outcomes. This helps leadership “sell” the vision that gathers others around a shared value and the tasks that make things happen. However, an overly optimistic leader with Pollyanna rose-tinted glasses does not serve an organization well. Skeptics can help you curb your enthusiasm when operating out of realism, which is a necessity. You don’t have to buy into a skeptic’s perspective. Still, they can balance our wishful thinking, self-referencing, and denial tendencies.

4. The Lieutenant. God bless this type! Most leaders would be lost without them, and most organizations would fail to make progress without their energy, skills, and single-minded drive. The Lieutenant in the organization is the one who delivers on the dreams. This person makes it happen. They are your “Number One.” Give them a vision, and they’ll find ways to make it a reality. Most of the time, the best thing a leader can do is get out of their way and let them do what needs to be done in the way THEY think best.

5. The Sage. The best leaders tend to be smart, but none are omniscient. Those who seek to be (“know-it-alls”) very quickly cease to be effective as leaders. In leadership, a little bit of humility goes a long way. Yes, your staff and your constituents want, perhaps need, to believe you are smart and know what you are doing. But, the reality is that leadership challenges are more about learning how to function than knowing answers. Influential leaders know there’s a difference between expertise and wisdom. This is the value of the mentor, consultant, or advisor in the life of a leader. The Sage helps the leader with three critical practices: perspective, discernment, and self-understanding.

Do you have these five people in your life? Where are they in your support networks, at the job or outside of work? Which do you need to cultivate to complete this company of the five people you need as a leader?

Israel Galindo is the Associate Dean for Lifelong Learning. He directs the Pastoral Excellence Programs at the Center for Lifelong Learning.